The final countdown
By Donna Strumski, La Crosse Tribune
June 11, 2005 — I have a countdown on my phone. It is titled “End of Life.” It tells me exactly how many days I have left to live, provided I live until I’m 100 years old and a 200-year-old Willard Scott is holding my nursing home picture up to the “Today Show” cameras. The point of this countdown is to remind me that my days are numbered, literally. Every day is precious and should be treated as such. That is why I find it so taxing to spend my days surrounded by Dementors. A Dementor, as any Harry Potter fan will tell you, is a creature that sucks all of the happiness out of you, until it at last sucks out your soul.
We all know them. They are everywhere. They are our co-workers, they are our friends and family, they are complete strangers on the street. One day I was walking out of the grocery store and was completely flabbergasted when an old woman asked me, “What the hell are you smiling for?” Hello, Dementor! I was too dumbfounded to respond at the time, but boy did I come up with a list of good responses that day. Most of them having to do with the fact that I was much younger than her. But really, is there any reason to go through life that bitter and resentful?
We all have bad days, but what good does dwelling on them do? If something went wrong during the day, nothing is going to change what happened. The best we can do is try to remedy the problem or if we can’t do that try to make sure it doesn’t happen again. There are an awful lot of coulda-woulda-shouldas in life, but we can’t live our lives filed with regrets.
A couple months ago, I was enjoying the YMCA’s new facilities and overheard two women talking in the locker room. I guessed one of them to be in her early 60s and the other to be in her mid-90s. The younger woman kept raving about the new locker room and how much she loved the new whirlpool. The older woman was having none of it. “Those things always break,” she said. For every positive point the younger woman made, the older woman had something negative to say. Later on in the conversation, it came out that these women were both in their late 80s. There could be many reasons for the disparity in how these women wore their age, but for my part, I’m taking outlook on life as a big part of the difference. Dementors age faster than positive people. The theory is not at all scientific, but good impetus for staying positive.
On one of our first trips to Europe, my friend and I were made to check our bags against our will. We went to Dublin while our bags went to New York. The first four days of our European trip were spent wearing the same clothes and some of our budget was blown on necessary toiletries. The woman who ran our bed and breakfast could not get over our easy-going attitude. We spent exactly one day mourning our luggage (which was one day too many), and then we cowboyed-up and realized we were in Dublin and had things to do. Namely, stalking Bono. I can’t imagine what he would of thought of two girls who smelt of White Rain Jasmine shampoo in damp clothing. We looked so miserable, he might have taken us on a shopping spree. Instead we had to settle for looking into his garden from the neighbor’s fence.
Putting things into perspective is important. My friend says anytime she starts to feel bad for herself she thinks of Auschwitz – anything she is dealing with will seem small in comparison. We need to realize that there are many people who are struggling to make it through the next 10 minutes, not just to the weekend. No matter where your day takes you, it is bound to be better than fighting to stay alive in Sudan.
So what do we do about the Dementors in our lives? Laugh at them. Imagine how much better your life is than theirs. Think of the time they waste on negativity and how you choose to spend the same amount of time enjoying life. You get a lot more out of the trip than they do.
Yes, we all have days when just want to mope. Just try to limit them. The choice is yours. You can bring everyone around you down or you can enjoy the day and the simple pleasures it has to offer. The worst days of my life have had moments of joy in them. That’s how life works. You get the good and the bad together. Some days you have to really look for the good, and others it’s right in front of your face. I have 24,793 days left, and I plan to spend them having fun. How about you?
Donna Strumski is a twentysomething, singleton gypsy who wandered to the Winona area about five years ago. When she is not traveling or fleecing her friends and family out
of their hard-earned money (their repayment is love, beer and the occasional culinary disaster),
– Donna hangs her rucksack in Lewiston. Feel free to contact her at [email protected].